Speaking Out of Our ARSE - (A Spiritual How Not To Guide)

Last week I was absolutely butchered on one of the island’s top bitchiest social platforms.

A client decided that he would display an absolute lack of ethics, simply because of his text that went unanswered on a Friday evening. My name and all that I have been working for all my life, brought to an absolute sham and ridicule and available for serious gossip.

I must have reached my ‘stardom’ between the hours of Friday night and the early hours of Saturday morning whilst I was in an absolute no knowhow of what was going on.

My physical reaction was to shake and be sick probably due to the unnecessary harshness and distortion of events. A normal reaction would be to let anger take over and dive into direct fire

Luckily, I gave up my old ways of going for the kill especially in extreme cases like this one.

My first instinct is to now hit the mat and let the Yoga decide my next moves.  

Having been a massive part of a cross fire between my parents during their marital war and also used as a puppet during their court proceedings, I grew up thinking that attack is normal behaviour and that my only way out was to push through with aggression. This, over the years nearly killed me so I happily gave it up when I encountered a more enlightened way of dealing with things.

Enlightened in this case meant that I chose not to participate and certainly not get caught up in the web of  negativity, low grade gossip and ignorant pettiness.

This enlightenment comes from having acquired in depth knowledge about our energetic centres - The Chakras

The Chakras in a nutshell are the clusters of life cells all collected in specific parts of our energetic body located alongside the Spinal column. Little wheels of energy that can subtly direct us to a higher state of being.

Starting at the anus and base of the spine (Root Chakra); the space between the pubic bone and the navel (Sacral Chakra); the belly button area (Naval Chakra); the spot in between the nipples (Heart Chakra); the little dot in between the eyebrows (Third Eye) and the top of the head (Crown Chakra).

The Lower realm lays from the Naval down to the Root - Ego
The Higher Realm goes from the Heart up to the Crown - Spirit

These little wheels of energy collect all our stories and events from conception and according to what happens in our lives, especially the first few tender years, it is determined whether or not we would deal with a set of healthy Chakras or a lifetime of getting them cleansed of distorted learned behaviour.

The same wheels of energy determine where our dominant power lies.
This ultimately leads to whether we as evolved human beings go about life, speaking from our backsides or actually drawing the energy to a higher realm and speaking from a more effective space.

Having this kind of knowledge has taught me how to pause and propel any negative emotion or urge within me to be dissolved and pushed up towards a higher realm creating a total opposite effect on the opposition.

Not the easiest of jobs when you are being badgered in front of 63,000 people


response vs reaction

This is easier said than done.

When we deal with a direct attack and our livelihood is threatened, the easiest is to attack back, defend and feel like we need to be right.

That takes us nowhere!

Yoga and Chakra work, in this particular case, was the saving grace that allowed me to indulge in my silent practise first before the expected instinctive reaction. The practise, especially done as a form of prayer with the highest form of divine intention, silences the chattering ego and lets you rise above. It showers you from that urge to react and positions you in your enormous grace. Closing your eyes whilst you practise, allows you to see your own purity and this in return assists you in looking at things from a place of soul rather than ego.

Now, let me just make things clear here.

This, in no way means that we take crap from anyone.

No no….it means that getting worked up and speaking from our arse in a reactive way is instantly erased leaving us to respond in a more composed manner. It is a ‘feet on the ground’ head up, hand on heart answer to anything that is trying to destroy you

To propel myself to get on the mat, when the attack was taking place and when the false offended ego is urging me to attack and defend required utmost discipline. Speaking from my arse was something I did in the past but I learnt its deadly repercussions so I have gladly given it up.

Stay with me, I’m going to navigate through the Chakra line and tell you exactly where to speak from and when but before that….

 I need you to know this

As kids, if we are not nurtured in the early years of life, unfortunately the energy remains stagnant in the bottom realm (base of the spine) and instead of growing up with a healthy ego, we become embraced by the false side of it. It means that throughout life, we will walk around feeling rejected, abandoned, offended, defensive, enraged at the past and list goes on.

It could be as simple as not getting what we need from the external world – an answer back to a text, a response to a job interview and anything that does not offer you security.

Basically, the security that you weren’t nurtured with as a child.

When we communicate out of this realm of energy, it is away from our spirit and more on a reactive insecure level which is not our real identity.

Communication at this level loses impact

When as kids, we are nurtured and loved and supported, then we develop a health ego and the energy rises to the top realm of the energetic body making us not lose focus on pettiness but remain solidly on our soulful path.

When we communicate from the higher realm, we unlock any stagnant energy and create expansion

It is all about projecting our words to reach a higher level of communication so we can dissolve any attack and negativity ultimately making life a more peaceful experience.


About the Root Chakra….

What is also referred to as the Lower Chakra, and the Unconscious

A depletion and an un nurturing of the initial years in life results in the blocking of this energy wheel which brings on addictive behaviour, depression, anger, terror of abandonment, rage, sexual disconnection, numbness, financial uncertainty, Inability to flow with life, blaming, longstanding resentment, suicidal tendencies, insecurity, monotony, obesity, hoarding, materialism, greed, fear of change, addiction to security, guilt, shame, distrust, Impatience, desire to hide, white knuckle grip on life, tendency to push for things, victimization, expecting the worst, numbness, neediness, denying own needs, rejecting femininity or masculinity, rigid social beliefs, bitterness and fear of mother & father, distorted sexual & intimacy beliefs, dispassionate about life, excessively sensitive and strong emotions; invasion of others, seductive manipulation, obsessive attachment and emotional dependency, fear, prolonged uncertainty, powerlessness, unresolved anger, aggression, domination, control, blame,

The most obvious traumas are learned behaviour, abandonment, physical neglect, rejection, poor physical bonding with the mother, malnourishment, emotional & physical abuse, shaming, authoritarianism, age inappropriate responsibilities,

All the karmas, traumas, anger, sadness, frustrations and jealousies within our lives are contained within the energetic flow of the spine and if left untreated, remain there in a micro cosmic form. Sounds scary but true. The spine is and will always be the primal portal and conduit of healing, and like blocked arteries impede the flow of blood, similarly impure energy, unresolved traumas disturb the Chakras and affect how we operate as physical & energetic beings.

The mind is above the ego but in the case of unresolved traumas, the ego takes over and becomes the master and with the ego as the main navigator, we lose our soulful, pure, child-like projection and we become animalistic offended beings


So here is your energetic guide to communication


Root Chakra
When you want to defend the offended ego and announce that you are right. When you want to react and really truly mess up a situation, go for it and speak out of this region – This is the literal meaning of speaking from your arse. It gets you nowhere especially when the opposition is also speaking from that region.

Sacral Chakra
When you want to seduce, this is the energetic area you use whether you know it or not. This is the place of sensuality and sexuality as well as creation

Naval Chakra
This is our Powerhouse, the gut and our ability to move forward and find balance in life.  So when you want a ‘let’s do this and get it done’ kind of talk, this is the energy to use and speak from

Heart Chakra
The place of compassion and love and the start of the higher realm of energy, this is the place to use when you want to tenderise and uplift a situation and rise above ANYTHING!

Throat Chakra
This is our area of communication so when you want to be direct with no frills, this is the centre you speak from.

Third Eye Chakra
When you want to intuitively command a situation and have the most impactful stance as you speak, this is it. Direct eye contact letting the universe know that you know exactly where you want to go

Crown Chakra
And finally when you want to transcend a situation or elevate yourself out of something completely, project from this space

So, next time you are under attack, step back, pause, silence the mind in the best way possible then raise the energy from your anus to a place above the navel and respond in the highest, most tenderising way and watch what happens!

Your in Words and Chakras



To acquire phenomenal coping skills, turn your life around and become the strong silent and stable woman that you are meant to be